I hate moving

Yup, absolutely hate it. And given that I've now had to do it 4 times in the last 1.5 years, I think I know what I'm talking about. Well, one of those times was only carrying my shit a block to Jethro's apt, but still. I promised the longer version of the last crazy week, and here it is.

So as might have read in the brief synopsis last week, I was just going along, minding my own business, having not heard from SMOE in any capacity in 2 weeks, thus leading me to assume that I was sticking around at the same school for the next year. I mean, the new semester starts in 3 days? There is no way they could possibly make the move now....I mean, they'd have to give me some heads-up on this, right? WRONG. As usual. As I was randomly checking my email Friday afternoon, I found the cursed thing lurking in my inbox. Yep, they notified me of the decision via email. Super professional. Especially after they promised me they would call me....2 weeks ago. The email left quite a bit to be desired. Here, see for yourself:

Dear Eric,



This is Rachel with SMOE.

Your new school is decided and it's 상봉초등학교 (Sang-bong Elementary School / tel. XX-XXX-XXXX).

My supervisor will send your current school an official letter regarding your transfer and they will tell you what to do.

You will have to go to the new school from the 2nd of March.



I wish you good luck with your new school.



Regards,



Rachel with SMOE



Short, isn't it? It seems like something was missing, right? Maybe directions or information on my new school? Hell, I mean, if I received this thing Friday afternoon, who the hell knows when my new school will receive the notice saying I'm coming. Will they even know who I am when I show up on Tuesday??? (As I found out later, the new school got word about me on Saturday....3 days before I showed up). So much for saying goodbye to my old school or anything. I feel like a douche now, having just walked out casually on Friday and I'll never see any of them again and the office mates were so, so friendly and helpful, but the email came at 5pm. A whole 5 hours after I left the office. Not much that could have been done. Thankfully, I didn't leave anything behind, well besides my old, beat up sandals that I got when I started college (yeah, pretty old). It's too bad the notice was so sudden. I didn't even get to leave a flaming bag of shit on the vice-principal's desk like I wanted to. Darn.

As you might expect, this sudden notice set off a lot of aggression, frustration, and hysteria in yours truly. This was only compounded after I used Google maps to locate the school and found out it was in the only area of Seoul I didn't wanna live in, namely the Northeast, as its a hella distance from Korean class and capoeira. Also, it was near Cheongnangni Station, which I knew to be a pretty dumpy area, so that didn't exactly thrill me either. I freaked out originally, as I may be forgiven for given the circumstances, but slowly I mellowed about the whole thing. The heavy doses of cool motherfuckers and alcohol probably helped.

Saturday saw the gang getting together at Tomatillos for some quasi Mexican food and tales of the most recent absurd school related shit that's befallen us. The girls had already downed a bottle of wine and Jamie and I are kinda strange to begin with, so the conversation got pretty goofy. From the there we moved to Oktoberfest, one of the vaguely German themed bars that offer actual beers (hooray!!). Someone had the genius idea that if we start drinking real early, we can sober up and be home and in bed by a reasonable hour. GREATEST. IDEA. EVER. Sure we started drinking at 5pm, but we were home and sober by midnight. Sure, its a grandpa move, but I don't mind.

On Sunday, Jamie insisted that we check out the new school, just so he could laugh at me about how shitty is might be. I would have been more pissed about him being an ass that takes enjoyment in the suffering of others, but I can't say this is a new thing when it comes to my friends. Anyways, we wandered around the area and, much to Jamie's chagrin, the school looked very respectable and new and the surrounding area, while very, very quiet, looked okay. Jamie was crushed. His mood improved when we played screen golf and he won by 30 something strokes. It would have been much closer had I not had to golf opposite handed. More lefty prejudice. Somebody should do something about this discrimination. No lefty clubs to use, no machines set up for lefties??? Awful. Although, I didn't play too bad for going righty.

Well, this whole weekend I was hoping to hear from my new school and maybe find out what is going on, but I did not. Not surprising, given they only found out about me a day or so ago. I decided to just show up to the school on Tuesday and hope for the best. I mean whats the worst that could happen? They could have no idea who I am, call the cops to deal with the "creepy foreigner lurking around the halls", then have me put in awful foreigner jail where I'm forced to wear hanboks and learn about traditional Korean culture (I'm not making the last part up...they really do that). Wow, that actually sounds pretty awful, now that I think about it.....gulp.

Fortunately for me, it all worked out very, very well. I showed up to school while everybody was in a teacher's meeting, so I waited for everybody to pile out and then stumbled into another white person. WHAT??? Turns out the school has some new really nice new facilities (gymnasium, etc) that feature some high tech English lab that staffs a foreigner to teach different kids from all over the district that come to take part in some special program there. The guy was Canadian and seemed pretty cool and was able to direct me to the co-teacher, who also seems like a wonderful lady. From there on, it was your standard first week at a new school. Lots of bowing and introductions and running around taking care of logistics stuff (contract issues, lesson planning, apartment stuff, etc) and lots of sitting around doing nothing after the lesson planning finishes. The highlights from the crazy week:

Co-teacher: This lady seems super cool. Let that be said first. The last co-teach was really nice as well, so it would appear that after my lousy first year, I've been rewarded by the gods for my suffering. She's an older lady, but doesn't seem to have any of the "I'm the person in charge, so you better fucking do what I say" attitude, like the teacher from last year did. Plus, she's the head teacher, so very good to be on good terms with her. She was super friendly from the start and we hit it off and were chatting within no time. The young teacher at the last school was really nice, but nowhere as outgoing and friendly as this lady. We chatted and got along really well, but we never had times where we sat around and talked about the weather or other various chit chat, like I've done with the new co-teacher already in my first week. I think the office environment really helps with that, as everybody eats together and gets rather energetic and lively, as opposed to the last school, where the office mates all ate at their desks while surfing the internet.

The Rest of the Office: These ladies rock. Even better than the last office, which is saying something. The office squad is, I believe, 10 people, including me. One is the previously mentioned co-teacher. There is one, slightly younger English teacher who I won't be working with, but damn is her pronunciation good. Hell, sounded native speaker-ish. Also, caught her on friday watching American talk shows on her computer and reading English language sites, so she knows her shit. She is a
cool cat as well, laughing it up with the rest of the ladies. Then there's the 23 year old female teacher. Yep, my age. And attractive. And seemingly not vacuous like many young ladies. And speaks pretty decent English. And isn't so freakishly skinny that I just wanna go over and feed her (no, that is certainly not a turn on). And isn't so terrified of a male in her presence that she runs away. All very good things. Then there's the two ladies who don't speak much English, but try their damnedest. First, we have Mrs. "Jolie" Jo. Why the nickname? Well, in order to help me remember their names, since there are a few Mrs. Jos and Mrs. Lees, she decided to take a nickname. She settled on "Jolie" since her lips are big, like miss Angelinas. Or in her own words, "Lips...like Angelina Jolie. Body....NOOOOOOOOO. Just lips. Only lips." Priceless. The other woman speaks more English and is (noticing a trend here?) super friendly. The few other ladies that don't speak too much English still seem to have a good, laid back time with all the rest. My kind of people. Also, their work habits? Wonderful. Starting next week we will be taking badminton lessons together...on the schools time. That's right. Rather than sit at our desks in the afternoon doing nothing or pretending to do work, we'll be playing badminton. Awesome. Also on Friday, I got invited to "skip out on work" as they called it, to walk over to Costco and buy some snacks for the office, while on company time. The ladies were even kind enough to wade through the big long lines for free samples for me (something interesting to note about Korea...people go fucking crazy for the free samples. Hell, some of the lines for free samples were 20 or so deep. Not sure why they feel the need to take every free sample. Maybe the recent past where food was not always plentiful? Really don't know. Funny as hell to watch though). The office also has lots of snack breaks, which is mathematically impossible to not be a fan of. And lastly, of course, they constantly inflate my ego by talking about how handsome I am, or how in awe they are of my height or how impressed they are with my Korean. I'm a fan.

English classes: Truthfully, they haven't started yet, but I'm confident that they'll turn out okay. Firstly, I have a sweet new English lab to work in. I guess this is the standard policy now, to build a fancy English lab to conduct classes in. I'm certainly not complaining as the class comes with a high tech touch screen multimedia board, 6 computer stations for the kids to use during class, lots of english language story books, tons of vocabulary magnets and cards to put on the board, and lots of other materials for role playing scenarios. So I have a few resources at my disposal. Perhaps most importantly, is that the previous teacher, an Australian bloke that stuck around for 2 years, was a very experienced teacher who put together a very thorough program for the English classes. So now the co-teacher and I have the luxury of reusing the things that worked well and modifying and adding to what didn't work. Not having to start from scratch is a wonderful thing.

Apartment: This one took me a little time to come around to, but I'm okay with it now. Obviously, the place was gonna be a disappointment after the relative luxury I've been living in for the past 6 months. Not compared to what I've been living in for the past 6 months, though, I'd have to say I did pretty well. For the apt's location, its very, very convenient. Much more so than the current one, where I'm a 20 minute walk away from any subway stations. Here I'm 2 minutes away max from the major subway line that cuts through all of Seoul. As such, the trees and greenspace and quiet will all be gone, but I think it might be nice for a while to feel like I'm actually in a city. That's not to say there won't be other sights. As I'm located right near some major universities, there will be plenty of young people, which is never a bad thing, plentiful English speakers and foreigners (probably students, many of which live in my building), and shit is generally cheaper as nobody has any money. Couple that with some of the dumper areas around the apt and you get for some near constant entertainment. I mean, a miniature horse tied up to a gymnasium in the middle of Seoul? He didn't seem too confused by the whole thing, but man did that blow my mind. If this is the level absurdity I can look forward to in the future, then count me the hell in. Plus, I'm only a very short bus ride away from school and Costco, where I can finally shop like a really human again, getting to make decisions on what I actually want, rather than acting like a scavenger at these smaller grocery stores, having to pick and choose from what meager choices are available.

As for the apt itself, yeah its small. But luckily it doesn't feel small, as I have a loft, which means the ceiling is about 20 or so feet tall. Also, did I mention I have a loft????? The novelty of the thing will wear off, I'm sure, but for now the idea of having one is so fucking cool. Also, I have one of those attic pull down ladders to get up there. The kitchen? Tiny, with minimal counter space, cabinets, and a little mini fridge. Not cool. I'll have to modify my purchasing habits, but since I certainly wasn't packing the old monster fridge full of food, it really shouldn't be a problem. Cabinet space? Minimal, but there should be enough to hold all my stuff, especially after I buy some cheapy plastic storage containers and toss them up in the loft to hold stuff I don't really use (winter clothes during summer, etc). The desk seems to be workable and the desk chair is not as lousy and broken as the old one, so plus there. The bathroom is very compact but should do the job. The only squabble there is that the door is only glazed opaque glass, so not the most privacy (only becomes an issue when I have guests and really when am I ever going to have callers??? exactly). Plus having the stinking pot of excrement all of 2 inches or so from your living room is never ideal. The apt does include a little TV screen with cable already functioning. Hoorah!! cept all the stations are the shitty Korean ones I never watch. No ESPN channels for sports, none of the channels that often feature american movies (or movies at all), and no music stations. In conclusion, I don't figure to watch too much TV. Also disappointing is the fact that the TV doesn't seem to have access for AV cables, meaning I'll have to get another one to play video games or watch movies. Boo. The bed, as anticipated, was a major disappointment. A tiny not so comfortable little thing. Perhaps I will look into getting a bigger and better mattress. Perhaps. However, there are more pressing issues to attend to, like cleaning. Yet again it appears that I'm to follow a dirty, dirty female tenant. Why must women be so disgusting? I have no idea, but this lady left her hair all over the place. In an even more disturbing moment, while cleaning out the present apt, I found, on a top shelf, no anywhere near the bathroom, in a little used closet....a tampon wrapper. Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. Not sure why in the world it would be there, but it just speaks to the depraved nature of the apt's former tenant.

Beyond cleaning, I have considerable redesigning to do, as I've decided, thanks to the helpful suggestions I've received, to move the bed up to the loft and set up the living room with a couch. This of course means I have to procure a couch along with a small TV and possibly a mattress. And given Korea's disgusting lack of thrift stores and used item stores (everything must be brand new and name brand...frankly their level of consumerism would make America very, very proud to see what monsters they've helped create worldwide), that task may be much more difficult and expensive than preferred.

All in all, not a bad switch. Course, I finally just heard from the supervisor that runs this current apt complex/dorm thingy and she isn't super pleased. I guess policy states that I'm supposed to give them 30 days notice I'm leaving, which was impossible as I had only 4 days notice. I had hoped nobody would ask any questions and I might be able to keep this place as a vacation cottage in the woods or something, but it appears my replacement at the old school showed up and caused considerable confusion. Oooooooooooops. Hopefully, I don't have pay the 50,000 won per day charge they supposedly ask for if you stay here past your contract. I mean, what did they want of me? The old contract ended on Feb 28th and I didn't meet the new school and get a new apt till March 2 and I certainly wasn't living on the street for a few days. They can send my bill to SMOE for fucking around and waiting to make a decision and for just generally being incompetent. I mean, I'll already have to pay some sort of fee for having to cancel my 1 year internet contract at 6 months. Again, thanks vice-prin and SMOE. Love you guys. Sadly, tonight figures to be my last night at the big apt, so I gotta say my final goodbyes before heading up north.

Pictures and videos will follow as soon as I get the chance.