The Cultural Revolution, in a way (no not really)

It's Monday again, and that means its time to post once again on the happenings, if such thing exist, in my life. As I write this post while munching on dried banana chips and listening to Sigur Ros, life doesn't seem so bad. Banana chips are a new delight, having discovered the fantasy of flavors concealed within a mere 5 minutes ago. While I don't agree with Korea's policy of drying each and every food product imaginable, banana seems to turn out pretty well. And guess where the bananas are from? The Philippines, which brings me to my next point....We are going to the Philippines, for realzzies. Amy and I spent most of last week in a bit of a fog, as we were perpetually fluctuating betwixt various vacation day numbers, but now everything has be finally cleared up to our liking. The basic problem was this: the copy of the GEPIK contract the Madison crew signed was a bit old and sort of out of date, as it only had 14 vacation days listed. Somewhere between when we signed in May and when we started the contract in September, GEPIK raised the vacation days from 14 to 20, and it was reflected in the newer contracts (aka everybody's but ours). Our schools obviously knew nothing about this change and are holding to the contract while we claim that the vacation applies to anyone starting sept 1, regardless of what the contract says. After much waiting and praying, we heard word from Dain Bae that we do indeed get the extra vacation, leaving me with 15 vacation days to still play with. The Philippines trip (I swear to God that I'm gonna learn how to spell the Philippines correctly with spell checker before this whole thing is over) will be from August 1st to August 15th, so I'll still have a week left over to do with as I please, whatever that may be.

The weekend was especially pleasant as it offered something new, which is vital given my attention deficit dysfunction. Friday evening saw the group trying a pretty damn classy Italian restaurant in Itaewon. The food was so delectable that I momentarily forgot my hatred of Italy (well, actually just Italians themselves....well, actually just Italian-Americans.....well, actually just one Italian-American and he had it coming). Buoyed by our inflated stomachs and spirits, we discussed on our homeward jaunt a great many things. Jethro and I in particular discussed the absolute lack of culture in our lives. I, in particular, was starving for some conversation about literature, music, cinema, and anything in between that can be declared even remotely intellectually stimulating. Since we only see each other once a week due to our locations, the majority of our conversations seem to play out in a manner akin to this: "Ohhh my god, you will not believe the shit my co-teacher/students/principal pulled this week......" "Are you fucking serious? Dude, I don't even believe that just happened." "What the fuck, man? Only in Korea, seriously, only in Korea." so on and so forth. For once, rather than bitch and moan about it, I decided to do something (I don't believe it either). I must really be starved for culture then. Now Yangpyeong isn't a horrible town, in fact its quite quaint, but culture it doesn't have. Sorry. Dirt, mountains, kimchi, and crusty old country folks do not culture make. I feel a little bad always referring to the old folks as "crusty", but really I can't think of better word for them. They literally look "crusty", like bread that's been left out way, way too long in the open air and has gone hard and stale. Our first cultural conquest was decided to be an art museum of all things. We settled on the Seoul Arts Center and its exhibition of Gustav Klimt's works. I knew almost nothing of his work going in (sorry, my knowledge of turn of the 20th century Austrian expressionists is a little weak at the moment), but the exhibit was fantastic. The exhibit was a pretty big deal as this was the first and probably only Asian exhibition of his works ever. I even found the other onlookers to my liking. The place was crowded, sure, but there was absolutely no pushing, shoving, and no rush to get from point A to point B like everywhere else in Korea. There was a relaxed and calm atmosphere surrounding the whole complex, which marks the 2nd time I've encountered that here in Korea (don't remember where the first was, but I figured I would be generous and give them the benefit of the doubt). When we got to his erotic nude sketches, there were no giggles and snickers and freakouts about the penises and vaginas in front of them, simply observation. That really surprised me given the kinda pathetic reaction that Doc Manhattan's "Empire State Building" got during the Watchmen showing. Seriously, I thought I was watching the movie with a room full of 12 year olds. Most importantly of all was the very favorable attractive young women to oxygen molecules ratio. I'd put it at a very acceptable 10 oxygen molecules to 1 attractive girl. I like this social circle. I even walked away with a small framed copy of one of the pics.

http://www.artchive.com/artchive/k/klimt/klimt_medicine.jpg

What? Did you think I was gonna walk away with a pastoral landscape pic? Cmon, you know me better than that. Our cultural thirst was not quenched, so we headed up to the music hall on the grounds of the complex and got ourselves a schedule for the various symphony orchestras shows for the next month. Thankfully, they have performances here on the weekends, which we can actually attend. The Seoul Symphony Orchestra, the big guy, apparently only performs during the week. This would seem stupid and ridiculous to the untrained eye, but one must remember that we are in Korea. All bets are off. But wait, there's more. We did some searching and found some jazz clubs that appear to be to our liking. In fact, we plan on frequenting a rather upscale one next weekend for Jethro's birthday party. They have a dress code, which obviously poses a problem for yours truly. I don't think "I listen to bands that don't even exist yet" or "I love Rounds cock" t-shirts will cut it here. Damn.

As for school, the last several days have been amusing. Had I been in a worse mood, they could have led to me pulling my hair out, but given my sprightly mood, I can only laugh. The co-teacher has been especially friendly and nice the last couple weeks, which lead me to believe that she finally had that mature adult blue whale removed from her ass. Possibly, but it know seems more likely that she was buttering me up for her next round of unpleasant demands, which she clearly knows I won't take lying down. Last Friday, when driving me home, she explained that we would have an open class in July. Nothing out of the ordinary there, as native speakers usually have to deal with at least one of these a contract. Basically, it consists of the co-teacher and native speaker getting together and making a really bitchin lesson, rehearsing it with the students (yes, I said rehearse, they practice it so that the kids answer perfectly to make it look like they actually know English), then performing it for several onlooking teaching tandems from around the area. The open lesson is always concluded by speeches about how the children are the future or some drivel. In general, this is only of the only times where many co-teachers actually plan something, as this is a big deal for the Koreans, as it is basically a job review and is necessary in order to get promotions/pay raises/move to better schools. It means nothing to the native speaker, so we usually slip to the sidelines and let the co-teacher actually do the planning and prep for the class. After my co-teacher introduced the open lesson, she told me that I, not we, but I, would have to come up with the lesson plan and make the preparations. Then in all seriousness, she asked if I had come up with an idea for it already, which is only fair given I had learned about the open class at least 30 seconds before. I just laughed and politely told the teacher I didn't have any ideas yet. I laughed to myself knowing full well that I have no intention whatsoever of doing all the legwork for her. If this crashes and burns, then its her head, not mine that rolls. Look forward to updates on that front. Today brought even more laughs when the co-teacher explained to me that Yangpyeong is putting together more of the weekend supplemental classes that they did last semester. Just to recap that, back in October, the co-teach came to be practically begging, saying that they really, really needed a native speaker and would I do this for her. Being a nice guy, at least back then, I said yes. The teaching job was miserable. 3 hours a day for 3 consecutive Saturdays, teaching really obscure/difficult/stupid/preassigned material to lousy students who clearly didn't wanna be there with a co-teacher who simply wasn't around 90 percent of the time. I obviously had no intention of ever accepting this extra work again, ever. So today the co-teach explained that they are trying to do extra classes in the evenings after my regular classes end (starting around 5 to 5:30) and also on Saturdays and Sundays. I explained to her that I go to Seoul on Tuesday-Thursday and are probably in Seoul on Saturday and Sundays too. She then began whining and moaning about how she can't get any native speakers for these programs and what is she gonna do, ohhh, Eric, please help me out, won't you help me out just this once? No shit, no foreigners wanna take on this much extra work. And the whole ohhh please help me bullshit is really unprofessional. If she came at me in a professional manner and set the job in front of me, rather than trying to guilt trip me, I might have been at least a little bit more inclined to the offer. Her approach is just disgusting to me. I explained to her that I don't have to do this work as per my contract states and I simply don't need the money and don't want to take the job, end of story. She got a bit flustered, uttered a bunch of "igo"s (Korean expression for "Oh my god") and eventually told me that I should think about it, working once or twice during the week (Monday and Friday, my only nights to unwind during the week) and 1 or 2 weekends a month. Now the job in the fall was simply 3 weekends, while this one, now that I think about it, seems even worse, as it sounds like these 1-2 days a week and 1-2 weekends a month would continue on for god knows how long. I told her I would think about. And I did for like a microsecond (actually, that's a lie. I didn't think about it at all). All this and the fact that my school will be receiving notice from GEPIK soon that I actually have 6 more paid days of vacation than previously thought should add even more spice to the mix. Given the stink they made about me using 10 vacation days over a 2-2.5 month long vacation, just imagine the fit over me using 15 vacation days over the span of 1.5 months. It should be interesting. Relations with the co-teacher and school can only go one direction from here on out, and you the lucky reader get to travel along for the whole ride. Hold on to your asses.